Chances are, you’ve probably heard the term, “FOMO,” referring to the “Fear of Missing Out.” If I skip this party, will I miss an inside joke that my friends will carry with them for years? If I don’t make sure to see every recommended landmark during my trip to Europe, will I ever make it there again, and will I feel self-resentment for not taking full advantage? We live in a country where a lot of self-worth and emphasis is placed on what we’ve achieved and experienced, not to mention what we can check off our metaphorical life boxes and to-do lists. But at what point does this drive to be a part of it all take away from the actual joy of the moment we’re hoping to experience? This question has led to a counter-movement of FOMO, coined by blogger Anil Dash as “JOMO: The JOY of missing out.”
Now, that might sound strange if you’re new to this line of thinking. But JOMO does not indicate isolating yourself and never participating in anything ever again. Instead, “JOMO” refers to the joy one can receive from spending time doing what they actually want instead of worrying about what other people are doing, saying, or experiencing. For some people this might mean taking time off of going to parties, or spending less time on social media, and focusing instead on the pleasure of smaller things and softer moments. For others, it might mean prioritizing the quiet of being on one’s own. Regardless, there is no better way to discover what JOMO means to you than getting away from the hustle and bustle of real life for a few days and looking within. Disconnect and take some time to hear your own thoughts once those other voices of should, what if, and supposed to calm down. To help get this journey started, we at the hotel have put together a list of the top benefits of embracing JOMO, and whenever you’re ready, we’re here to host you discover that Joy of Missing Out.
Top 5 reasons to embrace a trip of JOMO:
JOMO lets you rediscover yourself
For better or worse, it takes time to let go. Scheduling in an hour here or there to take a break doesn’t always cut it. But if you slow down enough to actually discover what you want to do, your own mind might surprise you with what it’s asking. Maybe you decide to spend a day drawing or reading a book you’ve never heard of. Perhaps you want to bake or maybe you adamantly decide you don’t want to do any of that and (gasp!) guess what?? You don’t have to! There is no right or wrong here. With JOMO, you choose how to spend your time.
JOMO is judgement free space: your time = your choice.
JOMO leads to better sleep and less anxiety
There’s a famous story about a Harvard professor of Psychology who once brought a glass of water to class. He held up the glass and asked his students how heavy the glass was. Students gave various answers, assuming this was going to play into some half-empty half-full scenario, but in the end he told them the weight itself wasn’t the point. “What really matters,” he said, “is how long I’ve been holding it. If I hold it for just a minute it feels very light. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a whole day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. Any longer than that and I will be very tempted to give up and drop it. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn’t change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.” This approach is relevant for all of us who live in burnout culture, where we are taught to hustle and stay busy, whether that’s for work, family, or general life experiences. JOMO, however, puts that glass down. When you take the time to check in, hear what you want or need, and listen to those requests, our anxiety and stress levels can begin to even out. So curl up in that blanket, put on that pot of tea, and turn off that phone, because you have nothing to prove to anyone.
Better sleep? Sign us up!
Dogs are pretty darn great at modeling being “in the moment”!
Self care is critical to reduce stress and anxiety.
It’s hard to say “No”
Now you might be thinking, “Perhaps this is true, but why do I need a weekend away to achieve JOMO?” And the answer is, you don’t. JOMO is there for you whenever and wherever you need it. But it’s also a reality that saying NO can be much harder in everyday life. Is it possible? Of course. But if you’re starting this practice of JOMO, why not get way for a few days? Go to a place where you have the added benefit of some distance to encourage the JOMO lifestyle and release any guilt (or FOMO) you might experience if you were to skip out on something happening nearby.
Need somewhere to launch your JOMO journey? We might have a good recommendation ; )
There are benefits to solo travel if you do feel like going outside. JOMO, by definition, encourages you not to overbook yourself, but if you happen to check in, and you decide you feel like going outside today, there are a lot of benefits to traveling alone. Traveling on your own helps you get to know yourself better, you can be as selfish as you want without hurting anyone else’s plans, and you learn to embrace making decisions for you. Best part is you learn to love your own company and stay in tune with your physical and mental health. Even a gentle walk on your own can aid in stress relief and digital detoxification. (Unless you don’t want to, in which case, this is JOMO, folks! Adding a nap, or completing any other activity can help with those very same things!)
Looking for a place to clock in some solo time? The Willamette Valley has some great options!
Or if you feel like staying in, The Independence has you covered.
Practicing JOMO helps you spot your habits and reactions
Maybe you embrace JOMO right away and its smooth sailing from there, but you also may find that FOMO pulls at you, whispering into your ear what you’re missing. Here’s the thing… one of the great aspects about practicing JOMO is that whether or not you let go of all FOMO, you still learn about yourself. You start to spot your own triggers like when and why you feel pulled towards that need to not miss out. Perhaps from there, you can counter that thought and learn to honestly ask yourself what level of participation (or non-participation) brings you joy.
The elements of JOMO can help you spot and work through the things that give you the sense tht you are missing out.
Here are a few suggestions to get you started
- Disconnect from the Internet and phone. The outside world will still be there later, and remembering that on its own can be a stress reliever.
- Only check news headlines once a day (and try to wait for an hour after waking up). Burnout is real, so really gift yourself this time.
- Be present in the moment (and by that we mean practice, because clearly that’s easier said than done). Stop to smell a rose, feel the rush of joy that comes from hearing loud music outside when you get to home to your quiet and comfy room, and take that extra long shower that’s for comfort and joy more than anything else.
- Take note of your senses as often as you can. (What do you smell, hear, taste, smell, and feel? What do you crave in this moment?)
- Most importantly, keep in mind that this is for you! If you’re on a JOMO trip, and you end up forcing yourself to stay off the Internet to the point of stress, that’s counterproductive! So remember nothing is off limits, the idea is simply to check in with yourself and discover what you actually want. Then enjoy it!
Words to remember!